Posted in Thoughts

Watch “Vlog Update” on YouTube

Posted in Thoughts

Good Place

I’m in a good place, in my head. Hopefully this keeps up

Posted in Thoughts

All alone

I feel like I’m on an island on my own and with a few real folks around me. Like I can’t. They ask me why I withdraw and its because no one protects me, my peace and nothing I say matters. Everyone gets to do and say what they want to me or about it and somehow its justified with people that should have an issue with it.

They wonder why I keep things to myself. I’m literally done talking. I’m over it all…

Posted in Thoughts

Every day…

Everyday is a struggle for me. Depression can be a scary thing. When I get in my head its the worst. I just sit for hours crying. A few nights back it hit me, I was just crying and crying and I couldn’t help feel helpless. I didnt want to feel anything and when you feel that way, the best way to feel nothing anymore is death. It was that extreme for me. My only saving grace was my son. God saw fit to have him up and around me even when I tried to be alone he didnt leave me. I knew I could never do that to him. But I need help. I thought about checking in somewhere, looked it up too but I thought of him. I know he is tired of seeing his mommy like this. I know he doesnt understand. Half the time I’m stress sleeping or crying. I have had therapy appointments that keep getting psuhed back hopefully this next one happens because I can’t keep going on like this.

Posted in Thoughts

vlog update 9/10