Posted in depression, Domestic violence, mood, opinions, Personal, random, Thoughts

EAS

So yesterday, I was gonna say tonmday but its a brand new day. I had a meeting with employee advisor services to seek help for everything that I have been going thru. Let me just say, I had no faith in this done to my visit a few years back.

They basically give you the run down on how things work, how they assist in getting you info on services that could help.

The lady really made me feel connected. I wish I could just talk to her. But of course I have to go elsewhere. But her advice and listening skills made me feel unjudged, and comfortable to speak my feelings. Needless to say I hope whoever I find is similar to her.

I felt a little better after talking to her.

Posted in mood, opinions, Personal, random, Reflection

So

So just an update, I haven’t mediated since the first 2 days I started. Idk I tried but didn’t seem like it worked for me. Because being an emotional mess, I’m horny all the time. Lol πŸ˜‚πŸ€·πŸ½β€β™€οΈπŸ€¦πŸ½β€β™€οΈ.

I debating on getting a buddy, but I think that may be good and bad. My headaches have seemed to slow down from having them everyday and/or waking up with a full blown migraines.

Court dates looming, medical follows and ugh! Part of me wants it all over or to pretend it never happened but it did.

Posted in Personal, Quotes, Reflection, Thoughts, Trending, Uncategorized

Quotes on Finding Yourself

So I was watching an interview with the talent and beautiful Phylicia Rashad. She said someone said to her this:

β€œAn image can be broken, try and find out who you really are.”

That spoke to me tremendously. That will the quote I have in my mind when I meditate tonight.

Posted in depression, mood, opinions, Personal, Reflection, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Figured I’d Start Meditating

The other day I thought to myself maybe I should try mediating. My stress levels are high, since I’m epileptic and my right side of my brain has been showing seizure activity I have been places on meds. Now the meds may not work, because my childhood is proof of that, and most likely its stress related I need to find was to help with stop stressing.

Can’t hurt right?

So I tried this meditation video and idk if them talking does it for me. When the guy talked it kept scaring me, but then it again since it was my first time. I did it for 20 minutes tho. I feel way more relaxed tho. Tomorrow I will try for the whole 30 minutes.

Posted in opinions, Personal, Thoughts, Uncategorized

Mentally Not There

I’m a state of mixed feelings. I want to feel love and affection but at the same time I just can’t actually deal with it. I feel like as much as I want it, I’m in a vulnerable state and I don’t want to dismiss the usual red flags or be taken advantage of.

Its not even the person per se, its more of a fear of being blinded like last time and getting involved with someone who means me no good. Even if they originally had the best intentions. Idk…. I can’t figure out why I feel that way? I’m in no rush to jump into anything.

Can anyone understand?