Last week I went to go sit on someone’s couch and tell them about my life. I know I need help and someone to vent. Each day I’m because of shell of myself. I know and thats the crazy part. I’m waiting for these people to reach back out to me, so I can set something up soon.
As the days go by I’m becoming angrier. I have these next two days off so maybe that will help.
Sunday and Today were hard days for me. I’m trying hard to get out of the rut, but it seems like everything is going to hell in a hand basket. I’m pretty sure I’m suffering from depression at this point. My mood goes from happy to sad. To the point that I can stand to see myself… my reflection scares me.
I want to sit down and talk to someone but I can’t seem to find the time, so I’m trying to deal with it internally but I’m 95% sure that it’s not working.
At this particular moment so much is going on in my life. I wish I was able to talk about it but I can’t right now. For those that know me, know exactly what is how. Buy they can’t seem to help.
I dont know what I feel or how I feel, or it I feel at this point. Part of me want to feel anything and nothing if that makes sense.
Maybe venting or expressing myself in my space will help. Can’t hurt to try right?
Seems like dark cloud are hovering over my life right now. What do you do when you are completely disappointed and drained? I have been the a variety of a emotions in the last couple of months. Honestly, I dont know how I get out of the bed every morning. I smile when inside I’m dying. I feel like the total definition of two faces. But I have to be, I have to push forward and I’m determined to fight this thing.
I really can’t go into details.. but I will be glad once this cloud as moved on and leave my life.
Praying for strength to push through for my family… because all I can try and do is protect them!